Three years of being infamous
Thousands of miles a year through Bucks and Oxon, past school runs, industrial estates, retail parks and motorway crawls. Your face, your name and your handle, in front of people who physically cannot scroll past.
The auction is live
Put your face
on my Alpine A290
for three years
One car. One face. I am buying a white Alpine A290 with your face on it. Not a small face either. The same face, tiled across every panel, one huge portrait where the race number normally sits, your name and X handle underneath. Driven every day around Buckinghamshire and Oxfordshire for three years. The press will cover it. Strangers will try to spot it. You will become a minor local celebrity against your will. Bidding opens at £100 and nobody pays a penny until they win.
This is not a sensible decision. It is a famous one.
Current top bid
£0
£50,000 to go before the £50,000 reserve and the eight hour countdown.
One carOne faceThree yearsAlpine A290Buckinghamshire and OxfordshirePress blast on closeNo payment until you win
One carOne faceThree yearsAlpine A290Buckinghamshire and OxfordshirePress blast on closeNo payment until you win
The brave
0 bids so far
These people have already decided that being ridiculous in public is worth money. Every face on this leaderboard is a preview of the fame. Sign in with X and you can follow any of them in one tap.
No one brave enough yet
The first face on this car is still up for grabs. Somebody is about to become the most recognised person in Buckinghamshire.
Yes this is completely unhinged. That is the whole product.
I need a car. You want to be talked about. We can help each other.
Nobody has ever done this, and nobody sensible would. A billboard makes you invisible. A car covered in hundreds of copies of one stranger's face, doing the school run in Aylesbury, is a thing people photograph, argue about and send to their group chat. The madness is not a side effect. It is the entire reason it works.
The story writes itself
Man buys car. Stranger pays to put their face all over it. Car becomes local landmark. That is a headline in every motoring, marketing and oddity slot in the country, and it goes out the moment the hammer falls.
Driven properly, wrapped properly
Fifteen years driving, advanced qualified, no speeding tickets and no at fault accidents. Professional wrap, washed properly, parked sensibly and driven like somebody's face is on it, because it is.
The bit money cannot buy
People will hunt for this car
This is the part sponsors never get. Nobody photographs a billboard. Everybody photographs the car with a stranger's face tiled across it sitting at the lights on the A41. Every sighting becomes a post. Every post carries your name and your handle with it. You are not buying three years of advertising, you are buying three years of other people doing the advertising for you, for free, because they cannot help themselves.
Sighting one
Someone in a Tesco car park takes a photo, captions it with something rude and posts it. Your face, their followers.
Sighting fifty
The car has a nickname. Local groups know it. People start claiming they have seen it when they have not.
Sighting five hundred
You are the person off the face car. You will be recognised in a pub by somebody who has never met you.
This ends in a headline
The second the clock hits zero the story goes out: national desks, motoring titles, trade and marketing press, local papers who love this sort of nonsense, and every social account that traffics in things that should not exist. There is no clever angle needed. The angle is that somebody paid real money to have their own face driven around Buckinghamshire for three years, and there is a photograph of it.
Before the hammer
Every bid moves the leader on this page, which means every bidder gets a turn as the face on the car while the auction is running. Free noise before you have paid anything.
The moment it closes
Coordinated outreach with the winner named, the wrap render attached and the whole absurd premise laid out in one paragraph any journalist can lift.
For three years after
The car keeps working. Wrap reveal, first sightings, anniversary posts. A billboard stops the day the booking ends. This does not.
How it works
Sign in with X
One tap. We pull your profile photo, your display name and your handle straight from X, so there is no form to fill in and nothing to upload.
Bid from £100
Every bid goes up in £100 steps. Your face appears on the car above the second you take the lead, and your handle goes on the door with it.
£50,100 starts the clock
The moment a bid clears the £50,000 reserve, an eight hour countdown begins. Every new bid after that resets it back to eight hours.
Clock hits zero, you win
The final leader pays by bank transfer within five days. Then the car gets bought, professionally wrapped in your face and the press machine goes off.
Under £50,000 you risk absolutely nothing
The £50,000 reserve is not a marketing trick. It is the actual number that buys the Alpine A290, pays for a professional wrap and funds the press outreach. Work out the maths if you like: three years of being the most recognisable face in two counties comes out at about £46 a day, which is less than a decent billboard charges you per hour to be ignored. Below the reserve the auction cannot end, so if you bid £600 and walk away you have lost nothing at all. No deposit, no card details, no fees.
- No payment is taken when you bid, ever
- The auction cannot close below the reserve, so the stunt does not start until somebody means it
- Only the final winning bidder pays anything
- Your face sits on the hero car for as long as you hold the lead, which is free attention in itself
Not mad enough to bid?
Help make a stranger famous anyway
The people who share this page are the reason the winner gets famous. Post it, link to it, argue about it in a group chat. Every share pushes more eyes at the car, which pushes the bids up, which makes the whole thing more ridiculous, which gets more shares. You see how this works.
Post it on X
Backlinks push our domain authority up. More eyes, more bids, better story.